Dear New Friend,



Dear New Friend,

Well, we are a year or more into our fledgling new friendship and I have laughed uproariously, smiled until my face cracked, hung out and did nothing, but hang out, dined, swam, gardened, shopped and chatted about everything under the sun. I also felt confident enough in our newly found connection to let down my guard and confide in you a little. You have confided in me too. We shared secrets and we shared ambitions and we just shared.   Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under All kinds of Advice

be kind, but be smart about it

be kind

Have you heard the saying, “Be kind to unkind people because they need it the most”? I’m thinking it’s probably credited to Mother Teresa and I’m sure whoever said it was just a true martyr in the biggest sense. I’m not interested in being a martyr anymore and if you’re anything like me, neither are you.   Continue reading

1 Comment

Filed under All kinds of Advice

this is it



This moment right here.

This declaration.

The preparation.   Continue reading


Filed under Just chattin'!

Talking with your mouth full


Bringing my warm cup of coffee to the breakfast table, I eased into my chair opposite my friend’s nine year old daughter before taking a sip. I was visiting them in California for a few weeks and this was my first day there. Still being on East Coast time, I was an early riser. So was her daughter, since it was also a school day.

Her daughter was busy scooping cereal from her bowl to her mouth when she started talking to me about her day so far. I stared at her face in total horror. Sitting across from me was her gaping mouth filled with masticated Captain Crunchberries and slime. I almost upchucked my coffee.   Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice

you’re a bitter Old Man having your picture taken with Tori Amos

on the beach

You got my mom pregnant

before you married her.

Then  you beat on her,

threw her down the stairs

until you left.

Before you left

you cheated on her with another woman.

And you beat

on me.   Continue reading


Filed under Artsy and Poetic

That shoe, on my other foot


If I get warned that someone has harmed my friends, I’ll be on my guard and probably won’t engage the creep on any level. I’m a firm believer that if someone tells me, “Hey, that guy is a murderer and he tried to murder me and he’s murdered people I know.” that I don’t have to let him murder me too before finding out it’s true.

Besides, isn’t the fact that they murdered your friend enough for you to ask the murderer what their problem is? Why did they murder your friend?

Or to ask yourself why you like the murderer so much that you’re willing to overlook the pile of dead bodies?   Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice

dying to win Death’s Jackpot


death and worms

I think one of the sleaziest declarations a person can make to a loved one is “I’m cutting you out of my Will!” or “I’m going to disinherit you!” or “When I die you’ll get NOTHING!” or the latest in a long line of threats…“You missed your chance!”

Who makes these kinds of threats and what exactly do they mean?

The person that gives you this kind of an ultimatum has run out of other ideas to torture you. They have reached their limit of creativity when it comes to keeping you in line and under their control. The absolute last resort is to throw the proverbial Last Will and Testament in your face.   Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice

Narcissistic Condolences


Usually when someone passes away normal folks reach out to the loved ones extending condolences and offers to help out, be there for them in their time of need or simply to reassure them they are loved. But a narcissist has no idea how to properly feel sympathy, or empathy, so their contact will be a little less consoling and a little more about how the death in your life affects them, than it does you.

A narcissist will make it all about themselves.   Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice

no one completes you, but you

on mountain

I know you have probably heard this one before, but I want to share it again in hopes that some folks might start to believe it and do something about it.

No one can complete you.

Say that to yourself a few dozen times, because that is truth in it’s most pure form.

No one completes anyone else.    Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice

you can come, but your spouse isn’t invited

this way that way

The first time I ever heard of this was in reference to a married couple I knew well. A group that they socialized with told them that the husband could still be a part of the group, but the wife wasn’t invited anymore. I just could not wrap my head around why anyone would ever make that kind of ultimatum to a married couple. What were they thinking?! These were the nicest couple of folks you’d ever want to hang out with and they did so much for the group dynamic and many of the members of the group. They were salt of the Earth, friendly folks. What could ever motivate anyone to issue such a strange and socially awkward invitation?

So I spoke up against the group for what I perceived to be very rude behavior, and soon after, my husband received essentially the same invitation. He was welcome to come, but from now on, I was not. Both of us laughed. Did they really think they were that interesting?   Continue reading


Filed under All kinds of Advice